#43 Know Your Love Language

Get Dr. Gary Chapman's bestselling book, Five Love Languages.  You can probably find it in your dad's library or get one for yourself.  In short, these are the five love languages, but you best read the book so you know how to figure them out and how to apply them:  

• Words of Affirmation
  This is when you show your appreciation with words, giving compliments about how nice your friends or spouse looks, or how great the dinner tasted.  This is one of your dad's love language.  People with this love language like to hear encouragement and words of affirmation on a regular basis.  That's how you fill up their love tanks.
• Gifts
  People with this love language LOVE to give and receive gifts.  You can speak their love language by giving them gifts or be appreciate of their gifts.  When you give, they don't have to be expensive or extravagant.  The fact that you take the time to research the kind of gifts he or she'd like, buy the gift, and perhaps wrap it up, means a lot to the person who speak this language.
• Quality Time
  Quality-Time-people believe that being together, doing things together and focusing in on one another is the best way to show love.  Turn off the TV and then and give one another some undivided attention. You may give tons of gifts to these people but if you don't spend a few minutes a day or a few hours of quality time together, doing things together, those gifts do not mean anything to them.
• Acts of Service
  This is your mom's love language. These acts of service like vacuuming, taking the kids out while your spouse is getting a rest, planting a garden, etc., need to be done with joy in order to be perceived as a gift of love.
• Physical Touch
  Some people, like your dad for example, speak this language fluently.  These people are usually the huggy touchy people who like to shake people's hands and pat them on their back or they simply like to hold hands or cuddle.  This might be too much information for you, but your dad can't sleep at night without one foot touching or resting on mom's foot.  Years ago, there was a women's retreat from church and mom had to go and spend a night with women from church at a cabin.  That was our first time ever separated from each other at night.  Your dad couldn't sleep that night.

Read the book. It's about filling up others' love tanks.  Ask these three questions to find out yours:

• How do I express love to others?
• What do I complain about the most?
• What do I request most often?