#84 Happiness is A Choice

As you go through life, you'll likely to encounter people who are doom and gloomy, negative-minded, and will suck the energy out of you.  They will whine about how miserable their lives are ("I was,...I can't .... I'm too....) or attempt to make you worry about things you can't control, like the weather, death, etc. ("OMG, did you hear what they say on the weather radio?  It's gonna rain a lot tomorrow and there's a chance it might flood our county!!")

It is true that whatever you put into your mind will affect your output, your actions, behaviors, mindset.  Input = Output.  If you listen to trashy songs all the time and hangs out with people who cuss 24x7, there's a good chance you will start following and producing the same behaviors and actions.

We wish we can say, "Avoid those people like plagues," but the fact of the matter is, you have never been in their shoes so you can't judge them.  Also, if you remember in the Bible, Jesus spends His time with the outcasts, alcoholics, prostitutes, lepers, criminals, disabled people, and so forth.  He did not share their doom and gloomy attitude but because He prayed every morning before sunrise and was in constant communication with His heavenly Father daily, He was able to bring happiness to these people.  Which brings to another advice: "Don’t add to people’s burdens, or take away from their happiness."

But the main message we want you to hear is that happiness is a choice.  People may criticize you, talk behind your back, ruin your career, frame you, etc. but in the end, when you wake up every morning or at every hour of the day, it is up to you to show up as the best you ever or as the worst version of you ever.  Here's a simple example.   Say you are in middle of a heated argument with your friend or significant other, and the telephone rings.  You saw the caller ID and it's your boss or pastor or a good family friend that you respect.  Unless you've lost a few marbles, most likely you will change your entire demeanor and tone of voice in less than a few seconds to that of a chirpy happy voice as you greet the other person on the phone.


Remember, you choose to be happy.  It's an inside out process that ignores external circumstances.  A child runs to her father because she's so excited to see him, while she's running she falls down and hurt her knees, she cried for a minute or two because of the pain, but she smiles again because mommy and daddy are now tending her scraped up knee and she's getting tons of kisses.  Instead of choosing to whine and pout all day and all week long, she chose to be happy and enjoy the blessings of each moment.

#82 Always Underpromise

and over deliver, every time.   Amazon exceeds customers' expectations because they always inform their customers after check out that the item will arrive within X number of days (say 14 business days) and always deliver the purchased items in a lot less time than what they promised.  They knew that they could deliver the item within three, five or eight days, but they put fourteen because just in case something happened, they can always make it up in time and in most cases, customers get a nice surprise, "Wow, it's already here!"  Even though we've been customers of Amazon for years now, it still gets us every time how they over delivered and impressed us every time we made transactions with them.  Underpromise or undersell your capabilities, and overdeliver and exceed their expectations.  Every time.

#28 Compliment

Compliment three random individuals every day, be it on your way to school or work, be it your co-workers, be it the cashier, anybody.  Don't make up things that are untrue  (Have you lost weight, Jenny?  You look good!)  Don't guess your compliment (Aww...so when are you due? **she's not pregnant).

Just smile and sincerely compliment them on the service that they have provided or how they look or about their performance, etc.  (Thank you so much for taking care of that file last week, Mary!   That's a nice red tie, John!   I'm grateful to have you in my life, Sandy!)

It will bring them up.  It will also bring you up.

#24 Success and Happiness

Sweethearts, many people are so obsessed with these three things: money, fame, and power.  Greatness has nothing to do with being beautiful, being popular, or even being wealthy.

Imagine this.  Professional basketball players (NBA) make millions of dollars per year, which translates to over $500+ per hour income if they were to work a 40 hours per week  job.  Per hour!   If you put yourselves in their shoes, these pro players have everything that most people can only dream:  they are über famous with tons of die-hard fans around the world, they drive expensive cars, living in multiple mansions, fly private jets, wear designer clothes, many are good-looking, and many worked hard to get to where they are today.  Yet, many have broken marriages, committed suicides, involved in drugs and narcotics, broken relationships, depression, etc.

Now, there is nothing wrong with being wealthy, being popular, being successful, or being beautiful.  In fact, your dad always says that the only people who say "money can't buy happiness" are most likely people who are poor themselves.   Money is not the root of all evil.  The love of money IS.  If you are poor, you are a burden to others, but if you have money, then you can take care of your family, go on vacations with your loved ones, live comfortably, and have the opportunity and ability to help other people.

But what makes life miserable is when you ignore life's important ingredients.  The important things that make up a great life are peace of mind, pure joy, great relationships, love, the blessings of health, and especially being in good standing with God.

#6 The Purpose of Crappy Days

Sweethearts, know this Mendon-Kawiley wisdom.  Crappy Days will happen in your lives.  They may come one at a time, or a bunch in a row.  It won't matter.  Enjoy them.  Crappy days happen so that you can appreciate Awesome Days even more!!! 


Imagine if you are never sick or get a sore throat or cold or food poisoning or hospitalized.  You won't know what health is, unless you've been sick or hurt.   You won't understand what delicious food is if you have never eaten bad food.  On the same token, you won't know, savor, appreciate, and be thankful of the great Awesome Days, if you've never had Crappy Days.

"A positive thinker does not refuse to recognize the negative, s/he just refuses to dwell on it. Positive thinking is a form of thought which habitually looks for the best results from the worst conditions." ~ Norman Vincent Peale

#3 Be Who You Are & Say What You Feel

"Be who you are and say what you feel 'cause people who mind don't matter, and people who matter don't mind." ~ Theodor Seuss Geisel